Have you ever heard those stupid quotes that claim something along the lines of…?
- “Be true to yourself.”
- “Embrace who you are and just be yourself; the world will adjust.”
- “Be bold, be brave, be you.”
- “Be courageous enough to live life on your terms, and never apologise for it.”
I’m sure you’ve heard them over and over again.
Where does it come from that being oneself, our “true self”, “true authentic self”, is, for some weird reason, an act of bravery?
Why is ‘being me’ a brave thing?
This is like saying that being yourself is a risky, dangerous way to live your life.
Well.
Sorry to spoil the party. But, in reality, you couldn’t be more in danger than when you are not being yourself.
The most dangerous thing on earth is not being who you are.
Putting on a costume to try to blend in with the rest. That is the most dangerous thing you could possibly do.
Why?
Well, for starters, you will always feel lonely.
You’ll be surrounded by enemies (or, just people who don’t have your best interest at heart), and you won’t even know.
And in the best-case scenario, you’ll be surrounded by people who have nothing to do with you.
Wait. How?
Because they’ll be drawn to you because of the costume that you’ll be wearing. Not with who you are.
What a miserable and mediocre life you could have!
This is the most dangerous way to live your life.
‘Being yourself’ is not something to be brave about, to be bold. This is about something way more important.
Listen.
If you are yourself (with your own preferences, thoughts, ideas, lifestyle, etc.) you are bound to have a great life.
And as a consequence (bonus points!), you will be surrounded with people that are YOUR people, that are related to you, compatible, with similar values, interests, or personalities.
Just because you are being honest with this ‘being yourself’.
Living this way, it is inevitable that the right people (for you) will be drawn to you, and you’ll end up having a way better life.
On the other hand, if you keep on living as if you were something else, living in disguise with a silly mask on, obeying external rules of what you are supposed to be or how you are supposed to live, rules that you are willingly (and blindly) have learnt to accept…
Those people that are meant for you will never be able to find you.
Why?
Because you are hidden.
If you remain hidden, they can’t see you, they can’t meet you, they can’t be part of your life, and vice versa. And those enchanted by your disguise will keep surrounding you while you feel more and more lost.
In the meantime, take care.
Love,
Noemi
